Skincoming DVDs for September 8, 2009

Mr. Skin’s DVD Pick of the Week

Crank 2: High Voltage (2009)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Lions Gate
NUDE: Jenna Haze (breasts) (Picture), Bai Ling (breasts) (Picture), Amy Smart (body double—breasts, bush, butt) (Picture)
In the blockbuster action sequel Crank 2: High Voltage (2009), Jason Statham reprises his role as hit man Chev Chelios. This time around, Chinese gangsters have stolen Chev’s heart and replaced it with an artificial one that he has to keep charged by repeated electric shocks. Along the way he meets up with a prostitute named Ria (Amy Smart’s body double, and some uncredited extras. Best of all, there’s a lip slip from Amy as the dude she's wrestling with hikes up her thong. Crank? Spank.

Dead Calm (1989)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Warner Bros.
NUDE: Nicole Kidman (breasts, butt) (Picture)
Sam Neill and young wife Nicole Kidman sail the Pacific while trying to recover from personal tragedy in Dead Calm (1989). Too bad they decide to save Billy Zane from a sinking ship. The handsome young man turns out to be a real psycho, as Sam finds out when he discovers plenty of dead bodies aboard the troubled schooner. By then, though, Zane has taken off in the sailboat—with Nicole, of course. He’s crazy, but he’s not stupid. Anyway, it’s a tense cat-and-mouse game from there, with Nicole showing off her own fine bait as she fights for survival.

Freddy vs. Jason (2003)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: New Line
NUDE: Laura Boddington (right breast), Katharine Isabelle (body double—breasts), Tammy Morris (breasts), Odessa Munroe (breasts, bush, butt), Jacqueline Stewart
Freddy vs. Jason (2003) has it all. First, it has Freddy and Jason, two of the '80s greatest anti-heroes of gore. Plus, it's got naked girls, thanks to the sexy Odessa Munroe, who opens the movie buck naked, and Katharine Isabelle, who flashes her floppers in the ubiquitous shower scene—though it might be a body double. As the story goes, people have forgotten about Freddy, and so he enters Jason's dreams to send the maniac on a killing spree to get his name out there again. Eventually, the two do battle, and now all gorehounds can die happy. Kelly Rowland doesn't show skin, but she hits Freddy in the family jewels when she makes the comparison between penis size and the difference in Jason's big machete and Freddy's tiny claws.

The Postman (1997)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Warner Bros.
NUDE: Olivia Williams (breasts, butt) (Picture)
The Postman (1997) is an unlikely post-apocalyptic drama about delivering the mail. Nuclear destruction has wiped out the government and most of the population of the U.S. in 2013, but Kevin Costner manages to survive. He discovers the skeleton of a dead mailman and takes his uniform and bag of letters. People really like getting mail, which makes for a good distraction between marauding rapists and pillagers. Costner is rewarded for his heroics by getting a little tail. Where most postmen are chased by dogs, Costner gets to plant his bone in Olivia Williams's doghouse. This movie stretches the envelope, but all that breaks is viewers' zippers when arousing Olivia flashes her package.

The Pursuit of Happiness (1971)
STUDIO: Sony
NUDE: Barbara Hershey (breasts, butt) (Picture)
The Pursuit of Happiness (1971) is about a young college student who goes to prison for vehicular manslaughter but escapes to drive his flesh stick into willing cock-park Barbara Hershey. The two go on the lam but end up spending a great deal of their time in bed, where Barbara shows off her boobs and butt. Will the authorities catch up with them? Will Barbara ever put on clothes again? Everyone will be happy if this pursuit never ends.

The Quick and the Dead (1995)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Sony
NUDE: Sharon Stone (breasts) (Picture)
Sharon Stone is the woman with no name but plenty of breastage in director Sam Raimi’s wild western The Quick and the Dead (1995). She rides into town for a big gunslinger competition, and it isn’t long before she’s got Leonardo DiCaprio and Russell Crowe shooting from the crotch. Sharon also has some unfinished business with local baddie Gene Hackman. This old-fashioned epic casts familiar faces such as Pat Hingle and Woody Strode as a treat for western fans. Meanwhile, a topless Stone provides treats for fans of what’s north of her beltline.

Requiem for a Dream (2000)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Lions Gate
NUDE: Aliya Campbell (breasts, bush) (Picture), Jennifer Connelly (bush) (Picture)
Experimental in structure and technique but documentary in its depiction of addiction’s downward spiral, Requiem for a Dream (2000) is an exercise in the poetry of self-inflicted doom. Director Darren Aronofsky has taken Hubert Selby Jr.'s harrowing novel and given it a visual life that is every bit as detailed and true-to-life as Selby’s original visions. Following the sad and increasingly demeaning exploits of four junkies, Requiem for a Dream is a tough and unflinching depiction that will have viewers flinching and leave them feeling decidedly tender.

Set It Off (1996)—Blu-Ray
STUDIO: New Line
NUDE: Tamara Clatterbuck (breasts) (Picture)
Set It Off (1996) is an empowerment fantasy for the amorally oppressed. Such luminaries of African American femaleness as Queen Latifah, Vivica A. Fox, and Jada Pinkett Smith embark upon a joyous thrill ride of action adventure as four fed-up women of color who decide to take fate into their own hands. The ladies determine that vengeance is best served hot; so they become the most scintillating, sexually charged gang of bank robbers ever to flare and burn on the silver screen.

Summertree (1971)
STUDIO: Sony

NUDE: Brenda Vaccaro (breasts)
Before he was Inspector Steve Keller on The Streets of San Francisco, Michael Douglas starred in the 1971 Vietnam drama Summertree. Douglas plays an all-American boy whose parents disapprove when he decides to flee to Canada to escape the draft. Brenda Vaccaro, who had made her nude debut two years earlier in Midnight Cowboy (1969) and who would become Douglas’s long-term girlfriend, provides the nudity. Burn the bras and the draft cards!