By Mike McPadden
The 12 months behind us proved to be no slouch in the realm of naked celebrity fronts, even though the most spectacular revelations were flashed for the paparazzi
rather than up on the big screen.
Even at the video store, famous T&A has given way to the F-list antics of Dustin Diamond
. Ah well, we'll always have 1 Night in Paris
That stated, 2006 did supply a bumper crop of bare starlets in fresh productions. We here at the Skin Labs have calculated the previous year's cream of the tops, sweetest of the seats, and choicest of the moists.
There was only one criterion: Each film had to initially debut in 2006, be it in theaters or direct-to-DVD.
And as a boner-us, we scoured the small screen to bring you our picks for the Top Five Boob Tube Bust-Outs of 2006, to boot. So stayed tuned until next week!
So grab your noisemaker and prepare for an explosion of party hats as we look back on the nude scenes that made us point up the most last year.
20. Sharon Stone (Picture: 1
) in Basic Instinct 2
Basic Instinct 2
resurrects Sharon Stone
's signature role--bisexual icepick-princess Catherine Tramell--who this time takes on London in her unmistakably omnivorous style. Thanks to all the full frontals, lesbian canoodling, and a hot-tub threeway, Miss Stone, as always, is guaranteed to give you a bone.
19. Zara Taylor (Picture: 1
) in Hollow Man 2
and Totally Awesome
Brunette nudecomer Zara Taylor
took off in 2006 by taking off her top--twice. Zara's za-zas in the straight-to-DVD sequel Hollow Man 2
will leave you anything but hollow, man, while her shirtless turn brings truth to the title of the made-for-VH1 1980s send up Totally Awesome
18. Anapola Mushkadiz (Picture: 1
) in Battle in Heaven
Contemporary Mexican cinema doesn't get more cutting edge than the kidnapping drama Battle in Heaven
, and skinternational sirens don't get more scorching than the movie's leading lust bomb, Anapola Mushkadiz
. Dreadlocked knockout Anapola plays a prostitute who porks a customer in a graphic encounter that can only be summed up as muy calient?em>!
17. Meital Dohan (Picture: 1 - 2
) in God's Sandbox
Israeli eyeful Meital Dohan
made her first splash Stateside this year on the smash Showtime series Weeds
. Arthouse audiences got an even more intoxicating view of Meital in the desert-set melodrama God's Sandbox
. As a mother in search of her daughter, Meital communes with nature wearing the outfit God gave her and even shows off her own sandy-blonde box.
16. Kristanna Loken (Picture: 1
) in BloodRayne
In real life last year, Terminator 3
temptress Kristanna Loken
revealed that girl-girl grappling made her gash flush with good feelings. At the movies, the flaxen vixen with the killer bod returned to sci-fi slinkiness in BloodRayne
, feeding her pink-tipped casabas to some lucky stubble-faced mook.
15. Monet Mazur (Picture: 1
) in Stoned: Unrated
One of Hollywood's fastest rising "It Girls," Monet Mazur
used her succulent two to bust ahead of the pack in 2006. Playing rock muse Anita Pallenberg
in the Rolling Stones
, Monet served up her Ruby Tuesdays repeatedly, once even kinkily co-starring with a whip. The college romp Whirlygirl
showcased Monet's amazers several times as well.
14. Sophia Myles (Picture: 1
) in Art School Confidential
Comic-book genius Daniel Clowes
and filmmaker Terry Zwigoff
may have faced some criticism that Art School Confidential
wasn't the instant classic that their previous collaboration, Ghost World
(2001), turned out to be, but Mr. Skin
can't join the nay-saying chorus. That's because unlike Ghost World
--which only teased us with superhumanly top-heavy Thora Birch
and Scarlett Johansson
--Art School Confidential
's leading lady, sumptuous Brit babe Sophia Myles
, comes through with nudity that earns a true T&A-plus.
13. Bryce Dallas Howard (Picture: 1
) in Manderlay
Bryce Dallas Howard
, the real-life daughter of actor-filmmaker Ron Howard
, made her major Tinseltown splash last summer in the weird-ass Lady in the Water
, but she debuted nude too, in Manderlay
, the most recent calculated outrage from Danish con artist Lars von Trier
is all about big, bad, racist America, but the only colors that really count belong to Bryce as she reveals that she's a natural redhead during a smashing skinterracial sex session. That's right, Opie's girl shows all three Aunt B's.
12. Crystal Lowe (Picture: 1
) and Chelan Simmons
) in Final Destination 3: Thrill Ride Edition
Along with Hostel
and the Saw
series, the Final Destination
movies have reinvigorated the horror genre with nasty streaks and inventive gore tactics that have already surpassed the slasher cycle of the 1980s. Another key element for which these new fright franchises are to be applauded: the return of naked female victims, fully taking advantage of the R-rating for their theatrical runs, followed by awe-inspiring unrated editions on DVD. Final Destination 3: Thrill Ride Edition
takes the series' Rube-Goldberg-esque death dealings first to a carnival and later, most memorably, to a tanning salon. Crystal Lowe
and Chelan Simmons
are quite literally sizzling as their browning sessions go bad. And thanks to an innovative DVD bonus feature, viewers can enjoy even more of their naked loveliness as they meet an ugly demise.
11. Julianne Nicholson in Flannel Pajamas
Fiery, freckle-faced beauty Julianne Nicholson
joined the cast of Law & Order: Criminal Intent
this season. Fans of the whodunit series are directed to Flannel Pajamas
, which Julianne turns into a "she-shows-it" via several sumptuous nude scenes, including a furry full frontal.
10. Lauren Lee Smith (Picture: 1
) in Lie with Me
Luscious L Word
stunner Lauren Lee Smith
turns the indie romance Lie with Me
into a skindie
classic. Lauren Lee kicks off the movie by explicitly dipping fingers into herself and then follows up with a series of full-exposure erotic assaults both solo and with an enormously fortunate fellow.
9. Amanda Righetti (Picture: 1
) in Angel Blade
is a down-and-dirty crime thriller written and directed by and starring David Heavener
. Set in the underbelly of the Las Vegas sex trade, Angel Blade
turns up the heavenly bodies of Kathleen Pederson
and, most monumentally, Amanda Righetti
. As an anything-goes stripper, Amanda nudes it up nonstop and even shaves a dude's ass with a knife. Miss Righetti gave me stiff spaghetti.
8. Kyra Sedgwick (Picture: 1
) in Loverboy
The skintense character study Loverboy
provides a star vehicle for Kyra Sedgwick
, and it was directed by her real-life hubby, Kevin Bacon
. Playing an unfit parent, Kyra sizzlingly serves up her Bacon bits mo(i)st tastily on several occasions. Look, too, for a rare rack reveal from Marisa Tomei
7. Kelly Brook (Picture: 1
) in Survival Island
Volcanically voluptuous British bombshell Kelly Brook
gets shipwrecked on a tropical island and, oh, does she have a lovely bunch of coconuts. Billy Zane
portrays her husband. Juan Pablo di Pace
is the couple's manservant. The gentlemen compete for the affections of naturally super-knockered Kelly. You'll feel their pain (and something else of your own) as Kelly unveils one of the most flawless physiques ever filmed over and over and over again.
6. Barbara Nedeljakova (Picture: 1
) in Hostel: Unrated
's last name won't be the only long and hard thing on hand when you watch Hostel: Unrated
. Writer-director Eli Roth
's landmark horror freak-out boasts more bare female flesh than any major Hollywood release in quite some time. Hostel
takes place in Eastern Europe, where life is as cheap as impossibly gorgeous nubiles willing to get completely naked on camera are priceless.
5. Jennifer Aniston (Picture: 1
) in The Break-Up: Full-Screen Version
The Vince Vaughn
comedy The Break-Up
is more like The "Crack" Up when Jen reveals her world-class ass at the 57-minute mark. Be sure to check out the full-screen DVD for a more, uh, "rounded" view.
4. Bai Ling in Edmond
Playing a peepshow dancer in the David Mamet
-scripted, Stuart Gordon
-directed arthouse drama Edmond
, bodacious, bisexual-in-real-life Asian sensation Bai Ling
delivers sweet Chinese dumplings. You can provide your own sauce.
3. Brittany Daniel (Picture: 1
) in Rampage: The Hillside Strangler Murders
Blazingly sexy blonde starlet Brittany Daniel
is best known for her clothed roles in Joe Dirt
(2001) and Club Dread
(2004), which makes her nude debut in Rampage: The Hillside Strangler Murders
even more astonishing. Not only does Brit show her mouth-watering chest bits, she also bares her fantastically gravity-defying gluteus and engages in Sapphic face sucking with Michelle Borth
during a swingin'-'70s threeway.
2. Gretchen Mol (Picture: 1
) in The Notorious Bettie Page
Brilliantly embodying the ultimate pin-up in The Notorious Bettie Page
, mesmerizingly gorgeous Gretchen Mol
does a lot of taking off. Naturally blonde Gretchen dyed her locks above and below
to match Bettie's trademark black coiffure. That's the kind of Method acting that Mr. Skin can get behind. And on top of. And underneath. And next to. . . .
1. Salma Hayek (Picture: 1
) in Ask the Dust
Mexico's spiciest export, Salma Hayek
, bares all opposite Colin Farrell
in the romantic period piece Ask the Dust
. In 2003 Salma's Frida
took Breast Picture honors in Mr. Skin's annual Anatomy Awards, and Dust
makes for a fine trophy-polishing follow-up. Thirty-three minutes in, Salma skinny dips in the Pacific, showing off her bouncing buoys, ravishing rear port, and even some ultra-tasty Taco Bell!