Mr. Skin's Pick of the Week
Virgin Territory (2007)—Blu-ray
STUDIO: Anchor Bay
NUDE: Elisabetta Canalis (breasts), Silvia Colloca (breasts, butt), Chiara Gensini (breasts, butt), Kate Groombridge (FFN, butt), Maimie McCoy (breasts)
Based on Boccaccio's fourteenth-century tome The Decameron, the romantic comedy Virgin Territory (2007) stars Hayden Christensen and Mischa Barton as young lovers Lorenzo de Lamberti and Pampinea. Against the backdrop of Italy during the Black Death, the two try to get through the complex web of obstacles keeping them apart. Although Mischa stays covered, we get to see skin from Elisabetta Canalis, Silvia Colloca, Chiara Gensini, Kate Groombridge, and Maimie McCoy.
As It Is in Heaven (2004)
NUDE: Frida Hallgren (breasts, bush, butt)
Michael Nyqvist is famous international conductor Daniel Daréus in the Oscar-nominated musical drama As It Is in Heaven (2004). Daréus's successful yet stressful career is interrupted when a heart attack forces him to go into early retirement. Daniel decides to return to his hometown in the north of Sweden, where he gets involved with the community choir and a local woman named Lena (Frida Hallgren). Things get really heavenly when we get to see Frida’s funbags, fanny, and furburger in a skinny-dipping scene. Talk about Swedish meatballs!
Gangs of New York (2002)—Blu-ray
STUDIO: Walt Disney/Miramax
NUDE: Eliane Chappuis (right breast), Cameron Diaz (right breast)
Martin Scorsese's Gangs of New York (2002) is the tale of a bang-up in Manhattan's Five Points section back in the days when the Irish were pouring off the boats and top hats were as tall as skyscrapers. Irish immigrant Amsterdam Vallon (Leonardo DiCaprio) is just out of prison and seeking sweet-potato revenge on rival gang king Bill "The Butcher" Cutting (Daniel Day-Lewis), who got on Leo's bad side when he went and offed his pops. It starts as a two-man beef but quickly becomes a stampede, ending in pure gang warfare. Meanwhile, on the sweatermeat front, Gangs of New York features the always chewy Cameron Diaz, this time as a redhead. Cam plays Leo's pickpocket pet with real aplomb . . . which is to say that one of her pert plums a-falls fleetingly out of her dress! There's a lot of anonymous toplessness in a party scene too, so if you want to play cineaste while taking in a tittyfest, Scorsese's your gravy. He fell in love with the story behind Gangs of New York all the way back in 1970 and fought to get it made for the next thirty-one years. It's meant to serve up a history lesson about the development of New York alongside the beef and bouncing meatballs.
The Girl Next Door (2004)—Blu-ray
STUDIO: Anchor Bay
NUDE: Sung Hi Lee (breasts), Amanda Swisten (breasts)
Porn stars are just like the rest of us. They move into suburban tracts, fall in love with the neighbors, and live happily ever after. There are, however, complications, the cinematic explorations of which make for the big-screen charm of The Girl Next Door (2004). It's hard to maintain the fresh blush of budding love with a lovely lass when you're a motivated and ambitious high-school senior dude and all your best buds are passing around videos and DVDs that document the apparently insatiable and flamboyant sexual acrobatics of that bruised blossom of femininity who has become your object of affection. But whose problem is the ex-XXX dish's sexual proficiency, anyway? The high-school Lothario and his happy loins or his player-hating pipsqueak pals?
The Godfather (1972)—Blu-ray
NUDE: Simonetta Stefanelli (breasts)
Although it was by no means the first movie, or even among the initial wave of films, that glorified and idolized the mores and modes of organized criminals, The Godfather (1972) was the flowering of all mobster cinema that came before it and set the standard for all gangster pictures to come. Visually lush, emotionally rich, charged with suspense, plotted with fascinating and ever-shifting alliances and betrayals, developing characters whose complexity transcended anything previously seen in the genre, The Godfather made superstars of its director, writer, producer, and primary actors. In one sense a historical document, in another a heart-charging, shoot-’em-up entertainment, The Godfather is among the proudest accomplishments of any American art form.
The Godfather: Part III (1990)—Blu-ray
NUDE: Bridget Fonda (butt)
Francis Ford Coppola’s epic tale of crime and punishment comes to a conclusion in The Godfather: Part III (1990). It’s hard to say goodbye to America’s favorite Italian stereotypes, but at least they go out with a bang. Come to think of it, they came in with a bang too. Nevertheless, this installment in the family drama finds the Don making the Vatican an offer they can’t refuse. The film features the awkward beauty of Sofia Coppola and more traditional heat from Bridget Fonda, who provides the skin that will have gangsters of any nationality whacking off.
The Good Sisters (2009)
STUDIO: R Squared Films
NUDE: April Monique Burril (breasts), Debbie Rochon (breasts)
The supernatural fright flick The Good Sisters (2009) stars scream queens April Monique Burril and the legendary Debbie Rochon as Kindra and Breanna Good, a pair of witchcraft-practicing sisters who perform some seriously skincestuous rituals and gory dismemberments to get rid of their nosy neighbors. Both babes bare boobage, and that will give you wood, misters!
He Was a Quiet Man (2007)—Blu-ray
STUDIO: Anchor Bay
NUDE: Elisha Cuthbert (body double—breasts)
Every day is the worst day of Christian Slater's life in He Was a Quiet Man (2007), the story of an office cog so sick of his job that he decides to shoot up the place. No one pays any attention to this nebbishy cubicle jockey; his invisibility is so potent that his complete collapse goes unnoticed. He starts carrying a gun to the office in the hope that one day he'll be up to the task of mowing everyone down. But when another man in the office does the deed before he can get to it, Christian finds himself hailed as a hero—with his handy weapon, he takes out the shooter and saves the life of toothsome Elisha Cuthbert. Newly notable and even doted on (and practically turned into a new fella by his boss, William H. Macy), Christian is no longer alone. But is he any happier? And can he handle the miserable deed Elisha wants him to do?
The Last King of Scotland (2006)—Blu-ray
NUDE: Kerry Washington (breasts, butt)
James McAvoy is Nicholas Garrigan, a young Scottish doctor who has traveled to Uganda to work at a rural hospital in The Last King of Scotland (2006), so named because "King of Scotland" was one of the self-appointed titles of Ugandan madman Idi Amin. Played by Forest Whitaker, Amin has just become the Ugandan president when he comes to Garrigan for treatment for an injury. Amin develops a soft spot for the doc, and he takes him on as his go-to guy and personal M.D. But Garrigan begins to see Amin for what he is: mean. Really, really mean. Amin kills the health minister, then snatches up the doc's passport when he tries to skedaddle. With nothing else to do but the deed, Garrigan decides to do one of Idi's wives . . . and he chooses wisely, because Kerry Washington has the finest heinie in all the land. Based partly on historical fact, The Last King of Scotland is a dark, smart, terrifying film—and Whitaker won an Oscar for his turn as a true ten-ton tyrant. Watch out for jillion-buck Gillian Anderson as a doctor's tried-and-true whom our randy M.D., clearly a man of distinction, tries to screw.
The Lost (2005)—Blu-ray
STUDIO: Anchor Bay
NUDE: Shay Astar (breasts), Ruby Larocca (breasts), Belle Morte (breasts), Misty Mundae (FFN, butt), Robin Sydney (breasts, butt)
The Lost (2005) tells the sadistic story of psycho thrill killer Ray Pye (Marc Senter), who has already gotten away with two brutal murders and is now stalking a young woman (Megan Henning). Megan happens to be the girlfriend of one of the cops who suspected Ray but was never able to prove his guilt in the earlier murders. Seductive scream queen Robin Sydney plays Ray's partner in crime, Katherine Wallace. Don't accuse us of robin the cradle if we want to see Ms. Sydney's privates made public!
To Live and Die in L.A. (1985)—Blu-ray
NUDE: Debra Feuer (breasts, butt), Darlanne Fluegel (breasts, butt)
If money is the root of all evil, then counterfeit money is really nasty stuff. The U.S. federal government has a law-enforcement arm, a branch of the Treasury Department, that specializes in policing fake-cash crooks. Its agents are every bit as rough and tumble as the most reckless undercover narc, and it is only fitting that their movie, To Live and Die in L.A. (1985), should be directed by William Friedkin, creator of the classic cops-and-dopers thriller The French Connection (1971). Like Connection, To Live and Die in L.A. is packed with grim locations, gritty dialogue, whiplash-inducing camera work, the clash of testosterone titans, and a chase scene that would set the bar for imitators and emulators for decades to come. Plus there's a soundtrack by Wang Chung.
Zane's Sex Chronicles: The Complete First Season
NUDE: Christina DeRosa (breasts), Patrice Fisher (breasts, butt), Laila Odom (breasts, butt), Johanna Quintero (breasts, butt), A.J. Khan (breasts, butt), Beverly Lynne (breasts, butt), Misty Stone (breasts, butt)
Zane's Sex Chronicles is an erotic TV series on Cinemax based on the writing of African-American erotica author Kristina Laferne Roberts. Writing under the pen name Zane, Roberts started an Internet blog to entertain herself after her kids were in bed. But her stories were so popular she soon landed a book deal with Simon & Schuster. That deal led to Cinemax developing the series, which first aired in October of 2008. In its skin-filled fantasy sequences, the show has featured softcore babes like A.J. Khan, who shows off her ginormous jugs in a threesome with a naked female prison guard and some dude. A.J. will have you giving yourself an HJ.
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